Abu Musa reported: The Prophet, peace be upon him, said,

'Verily, the parable of good and bad company is that of a seller of musk and a blacksmith.  The seller of musk will give you perfume, you will buy some, or you will notice a pleasant smell.  As for the blacksmith, he will burn your clothes, or you will notice a bad smell."

Oh how much Sister gave out that beautiful musk.  She wasn't one of many words but taught by doing.  She would go visit the sick when she herself had health problems.  She was the first to drop off soup/food when someone was ill.  She would take care of lonely old women in her city always helping them with their tasks.  She never would say no to any of the classes i would tell her to teach.  She gave of her time and talents so freely.  She was my anchor in Delaware.  She taught me what was important-those small deeds of kindness one does for others.  

She loved to run after knowledge of the Creator.  She did it so fervently and with such beautiful patience.  I am so grateful that during her last year she was in our sahaba class.  I can hold on to that memory. 

When I was moving, she stayed till the last minute to help pair off my kids' socks to pack.  She took the long trip by train to visit me all the way in NC.  How precious is that?

How blessed I was to have her as my friend in this life.  She wasn't my family.. she wasn't young, she was just a 'true friend'. And how rare is that these days.  

Oh how I loved her and miss her voice.  May Arraheem have mercy on her and widen & illuminate her grave and grant her Jannatul Firdous. 

 "O Changer of hearts! Make my heart firm on your religion."

This is such a beautiful dua.  Allah puts us in positions at times in life for us to use these duas most fervently.  

As Yasmin Mogahed says in her book Healing the Emptiness: "...the duaa that we make while 'comfortable' on the shore is not like the duaa we make while in the middle of the ocean in a storm.'

Learn this dua and use it for yourself and your loved ones.  He is the One in control of hearts and He alone can change the hearts of others to His obedience.  Call Him in broad daylight, in the depths of darkness, alone or with company and you will never be disappointed.  

Attitude in Life

Ates vardir somunu yakar kul eder.  

Ates vardir somunu pisirir

Senin dustugun yeri o gosterdi

Isyan etmek ne sana ne de obadakilere duser

Bu Cenabi Allah'in bir sinavi

Bu sinavda kul olmak da var, pismek de

Onun icin icindeki vesveeselere de

The fire can burn a dough and turn it into ash...

or it may cook the dough into bread 

it was He who took you to that place you fell.

You don't have the right to protest His decision, nor does the tribe

This is a test from the Great God

In this test we can either turn to ash...

or transform into bread.  So don't listen to those whispers inside you..

This was Hayme ana's advice to his son, when a commander threatened to kill the whole tribe after Ertugrul saved  Halime and her family and brought them to the tribe.  

She put it so eloquently.  

'The fire can burn a dough and turn it to ash or it may cook the dough into bread'

All of us will have challenges and problems in life.  It is what we do with them that will determine our end.  It's the attitude we take with every hurdle that comes our way.  Do we complain and despair or do we find the other precious things that are going right and stay grateful.  The same problem can build a person's character or destroy a person.  

The Prophet,upon him be peace, said: "Wondrous is the affair of the Mu'min (the believer); verily all his affairs are good for him.  If something pleasing befalls him he thanks Allah and it becomes better for him.  And if something harmful befalls him he is patient and it becomes better for him.  

I'm Back.

I had so much fun reading my posts that I had written 10 years ago, that I feel I must write again.  If I hadn't written about the kids at that time, I would have forgotten so many things that were so precious.

Thus, I will write about mundane and extraordinary things, so that one day my kids might enjoy reading about the past and perhaps learn about what things inspired their mother.

Hayme Ana, the Mother of Ertugrul, is such a strong and important figure in the show Ertugrul.  Many of her words inspire us to see and learn from the wisdom of our traditions. 

When the tribesmen were stoning the tent of Halime after they learnt many of their sons had died, Hayme Ana stopped them, reminding them:

"Bu obadaki herkes benim evladim, benim yuregim
Oba dedigin, birlik ve beraberligin oldugu zaman ayakta kalir birlik bozulmussa dusmanin karsisinda yenilmeye, yok olmaya mahkumsunuzdur"

"Everyone in this tribe is my child, my heart!
A tribe can only stand strong when they are united.  If there is no unity, you would be condemned to lose against the enemy and be wiped out."

This was so important for her to say.  Even though her child did not die, she reminded them that for a leader, everyone's child is like her own.  She cared and loved each of them, which you can see from the beys in the tribe.  They treated each other as family.  Someone's joy or sorrow was their joy and sorrow. 
Every family/community/country can stay strong when they are united.  They can accomplish so much when they are in harmony and take care of each other. When they take care of their strong and weak among themselves.  Once we lose that unity, people from both within and from the outside can harm and destroy us.  And that enemy does not have to be physical.  Staying united and connected in a community might help us ward off hidden enemies like depression.  When one of us gets hit with a calamity, the community needs to unite to support and bring that person up again.  That's what Muhammad, upon him be peace, taught us about 'brotherhood' and the 'ummah'.  

I love Hayme Ana's strength and confidence in the show.  It is what helps her tribe stay strong many times when things/people try tearing it apart.  

But I also see the pain and hardship she has to go through in the show.  It's not easy to be a leader.  When you realize, your directions can hurt someone.  But you must give them for the benefit of the whole tribe/community.  

May the Most Gracious give us wisdom and patience to stay united and wisdom to lead in the best of ways.  

Sura Nur:27. O you who believe! Enter not houses other than your own, until you have asked permission and greeted those in them; that is better for you, in order that you may remember.) (28. And if you find no one therein, still enter not until permission has been given. And if you are asked to go back, go back, for it is purer for you. And Allah is All-Knower of what you do.) (29. There is no sin on you that you enter houses uninhabited, you have any interest in them. And Allah has knowledge of what you reveal and what you conceal.)

Isn't it amazing that Allah is so Merciful that He even takes care of how to enter each other's privacy? It might seem like a minute detail to us, but Allah is creating an Islamic society in Sura Nur and He doesn't leave any stone unturned. The greeting of Assalamu Alaikum is also mandated here. All over the world, no matter which corner we are in, Muslims have an identical identity: they greet each other with salam. What a beautiful uniformity.

I remember a few times when I called someone that I wanted to visit that person and that person told me she was busy. I felt upset and hurt. But Allah is telling us here that it is okay, it is their right, they can be busy at that particular moment and that it is better for us that we go back. It creates a sense of humbleness in us. Can you imagine how Caring Allah is to care about our own small privacy? How generous and Gracious He is!

We learned that this asking of permission and familiarization is called "isti'nas".

My children and I had this experience a few days ago. We were invited to come to someone's house and decided to follow the above ayat after ringing the bell 3 times(sunnah) and not hearing a response. It had been so hard to go out with all the children at the early hour to this sister's house. But we are told that it is okay and this action is purer for us. What other comforting words can there be for our lives? I was just happy to be living this ayat with my children as the week before we had studied it.